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Posts Tagged ‘Love’

Beloved

Wednesday, April 14th, 2010

The Beloved simply is. In fact, in it’s exploration—at the center of that indescribable feeling of simply being, of ishness—the Beloved is discovered spontaneously, self-effulgent, the presence within the presence.”
– Stephen & Ondrea Levine

A Meditation on the Beloved:

Beloved
Let that drop in
Beloved
Go deep inside
Who is your beloved?
Where in your body is the beloved?
Beloved
Is it falling into you yet?
Look back into yourself.
Beloved
Drop in a little more
Beloved
Listen with your eyes
Hear with your heart
Beloved
What are you experiencing now?
Beloved
Be Love

You are loved. Stay there.
Mary Anne

This is dedicated to all who have allowed me to experience the Beloved—Lorene, Val, Paulette, Meredith, Louis, Joe, Greg, and Myron.

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Overwhelmed by Love

Friday, April 9th, 2010

Sometimes I hit the “enter” button on the keyboard and wonder how people will respond to one of my writings I post publicly on my blog. I was so excited to write a blog about “coming out” and how we all get a chance to do that every day when we live life as who we are openly and authentically. I spent years being ashamed of who I was, which brought me so much unhappiness. It has taken me some time, but now all parts of my life are integrated – loving relationships, friendships, hobbies, spirituality, work, and dreams.

Many people were moved by my “coming out” blog and have written some amazing responses. I am sharing some of the responses because they were full of so much wisdom. I have been overwhelmed by the love and acceptance that has flowed my way. May each day give us a chance to embrace who we are and allow our full light to shine.

“Here’s to being able to truly be authentic, to openly say ‘this is an important part of who I am’, without shame or fear. I look forward to embracing & welcoming others doing the same, whatever hidden part of themselves that may be.”

“I too blew off the (High School) reunion thinking no one would remember me or care if I was there, and it saddens me to think you felt alone during any part of your life.”

“I am happy to have found all the PC (High School) people here, as well. So many people (girls and guys) that I wish I had gotten to know then…because I’m coming to learn that we can each offer support and friendship to others.”

“In many ways, the most significant ‘coming outs’ for me have been politically and spiritually and those self-realizations might not have happened if it wasn’t for my needing to deal with my sexual orientation. As you said, I needed to live authentically before my light could shine, both in personal relationships and professionally.”

“But then I thought, what would I have done if you shared this with me? Would I have had the maturity and grace and compassion to accept you, to help you? Probably not, back then. It’s a cruel trick of nature that we start to realize who we are, just when our peers are least likely to accept us! But if there is one thing I’ve learned, and something I hope (God I hope) I can impart to my daughters, it’s this: EVERYONE feels alone and different and depressed and disconnected in high school, at some point. Nobody ever feels they are good enough. We need to live a lot of years before we realize, hey, we’re ok after all.”

With gratitude,
Mary Anne

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March OM Meditations

Wednesday, March 31st, 2010

In keeping with the rhythm of sharing monthly meditations and the new season of Spring, I invite you to join me in celebrating March with some meditations and contemplative questions as a way to open up to more love.

As an invitation, feel free to close your eyes, sit with your spine straight and take a few soft breaths. Then inhale a little deeper through your nose, and on the exhale, repeat the mantra OM (AUM).  Do this three times. Allow yourself to really feel everything and become the observer of your thoughts. Feel free to focus on one question or statement below and just allow your experience to unfold

Love What Is Now. Love What is Now.

I am open to the rhythms of the world.

Beloved, what do you hear in the silence?

“I love you and you are perfect exactly as you are.”

How do you become an observer of your thoughts? What practices allow you to see things as they are?

We show up with love and that is all grief needs to flow into grace. We show up with love because in the end that’s all we really need.

What seeds (inside yourself) are you watering?

The invitation is to be open for whatever thoughts flow through you. Allow your mind and body to expand into the experience (without judgment).  Feel free to start with whatever mantra calls to you.

May you experience the bursting of seeds within your heart and mind. Take time to water the garden of you!

In every moment, there is grace,
Mary Anne


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The Sacred Space of You

Monday, March 29th, 2010

Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again
– Joseph Campbell

After spending a gray and damp Sunday cleaning the house, I thought about how much “space” there was after removing lots of clutter. Every weekend I have been dedicating time to throwing away papers, making donations bags, and clearing corners of the house. I realized how much space there really is in my apartment. Other than my collection of books, drums, stones/crystals, CD’s, sweatshirts, and mastana’s (altar cloths), I am pretty much a minimalist. I don’t own a lot or have stuff all over the walls. Perhaps because I grew up with a lot of knick-knacks and tables that had beautiful Irish Belleek and doilies on the table (every table), I wanted to have less things to collect. My house growing up had a lot of nice things and many photos—including pictures from First Communion all the way through College graduation, and many photos in between.

I like having space in the house without the need to put something there. How often do we fill a space rather than just let an area remain empty? How else are we filling the space in our lives? What are we filling our space up with?

Think about the space in between musical notes—otherwise known as “rest.” This allows us to live in the space between the notes—that’s where the quiet space is. How can we allow the space to teach us, to fill us, to empty us?

Love the space in between because you are that space. Find the sacred space of you and stay there. Remove the clutter within and make space for more love.

To the sacred space of you,
Mary Anne

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Ella Mae Johnson: A Legacy of Compassion

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010

In honor of Women’s History Month, here is an amazing story of Ella Mae Johnson. Her memoir will be published next month, It Is Well With My Soul: The Extraordinary Life of a 106-Year Old Woman. As her co-writer, Patricia Mulcahy said, “Ella Mae’s real lesson is that compassion is what will get you through life.”

Ella Mae passed away on Monday, 3/22, at home surrounded by friends. She left us a legacy of life.

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“I Need to Know”

Friday, March 19th, 2010

One of my greatest teachers is my seven year old nephew, George. As soon as we see each other, we give each other big hugs. His face lights up when I walk in the room and my heart lights up when he walks in the room. My last visit with him was no exception. It had been a good few weeks since my past visit with George. When I walked in the door, there was an excited shout, “Aunt Mary Anne, you’re here!” I gave him a tight hug and said, “I’ve missed you.” George responded, “I haven’t seen you in three months.” It was his way of saying that it felt like a really long time.

We decided to go out for lunch. Upon returning to my sister’s house, George and I went for a walk. There is a wonderful small pond near his house and George took my hand and off we went. We spoke about school, his trip to Ireland, his birthday, and other random things. Upon returning back to the house, he said he wanted to stay outside. Although most of their lawn still had a lot of snow, the day was bright and not that cold, so we decided to play in the driveway. Our first game was “Mario Brothers goes to the Winter Olympics.” George would name a Mario character and an Olympic event, act out the event, and give a score. The highlight was watching him pretend to ice skate and do curling – as entertaining as the live Olympics.

We decided we would play hide and go seek in the backyard. I hid first and George could not find me despite giving hints with making noises. I came out of my spot and George asked, “Where were you?” I told him I would hide there again on my next turn. He said, “But where were you?” I told him that he can look again on the next round. “But Aunt Mary Anne, I need to know.” It was at that point I smiled and asked, “You need to know?” I think he wanted to know and it was hard for him to look again. He took his turn hiding and then I took mine, returning to the same spot. I peeked out and George found me.

All day I couldn’t get his little voice and expression out of my head – I need to know. How many times had I wanted to know something that I convinced myself I needed to know it? Is there anything I really need to know?

The day was full of big hugs, long walks, being lost and being found – I have everything I need to know.

Mary Anne

This is dedicated to my nephew George who I love this, this, this, this much!

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Irish Inspiration

Wednesday, March 17th, 2010

Take time to work;
It is the price of success.

Take time to think;
It is the source of power.

Take time to play;
It is the source of perpetual youth.

Take time to read;
It is the foundation of wisdom.

Take time to be friendly;
It is the road to happiness.

Take time to dream;
It is hitching your wagon to a star.

Take time to love and be loved;
It is the privilege of the gods.

Take time to look around;
It is too short a day to be selfish.

Take time to laugh;
It is the music of the soul.

—Old Irish Prayer

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From Grief to Grace

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

Two years ago I wrote an article about grief that was published on-line. I was feeling the emotions of grief that revisited my heart. I wrote that when grief inhabits my heart it hits like the wave at the ocean. For a long-time I had an annual grief “visit” and the whole world would become silent and motionless.

I wrote in the article, “For some time, I push away the grief like a fly in my ear. But the grief begins to fill my entire body, each cell becoming morphed with endless emptiness. I search my mind for a cause.  I look for the basic needs of the season; I need more sun! There is more than sunshine needed to replenish the parts of me lost and forgotten. I dig deeper and find that I have become disconnected to the necessary life cycles. I am distracted by what’s around me and not connected with who is around me. When there is deep grief, I believe there is often great loneliness. I am a sojourner on the grief path.

It’s the annual visit by grief that consumes my heart and opens the void. I know allowing grief to come and go freely, without judging or blaming, is the key. For me, grief reminds me of how many things I no longer remember and how I long to connect with loved ones that have crossed. I long to pick up the phone and tell my mom about my day, my new project, or a class I am teaching. But my mom passed away, and all I have is the belief that she will hear my voice when I tell her out loud.

There is a crossover between beginnings and endings. I am overwhelmed by the notions of life and death. I wonder if the word “breath” is really just a combination of birth and death.”

It’s been almost ten years since my mom’s passing and I am reminded again of grief as I watch a loved one learn about the return of malignant tumors.  I am reminded of how precious each moment of life is. The gift of grief is that you are completely present to it.

Whether we know how much time we have with a loved one or not, it’s the lesson of “showing up”, even when it’s not easy. We show up with love and that is all grief needs to flow into grace. We show up with love because in the end that’s all we really need.

Mary Anne

This is dedicated to Lorene and her mom.

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‘Love What Is Now’

Monday, March 1st, 2010

In early January I had the honor and privilege of guiding a shamanic healing session with an incredible woman who was going to have surgery to have her leg amputated because of numerous infections. After my session with Monica, we spoke about new ways of looking at ‘healing’ on many levels. I gave her a mantra to repeat as part of her on-going healing and asked her to wait and see for what unfolds. The mantra was: ‘Love What Is Now.’ Last week Monica sent me an email that I believe expresses a beautiful experience of Love What Is Now and has given permission to share it. Below is an excerpt.

“I went to work with Bryan after the appointment. It was so nice to not be homebound I crazily said, “Take me to work. I’ll clean up your messy file cabinet. I know you have one.” Bryan laughed. We got some lunch and then headed to his office.

After everyone saw me come in with one leg, Bryan set about doing his own work while I filed. As he was copying something outside his office door, I heard someone ask him, in a polite, well-intended tone, “How can you stay so strong and love so much in this situation with Monica?”

He paused a moment, but not too long and said, “I love what is. Right now. You have to or you go crazy over what could be…or not be. I love what IS…NOW.” I heard some mumbles from the other person about how great that was and something to think about. Bryan came back in his office door whistling and winked at me, “Got ears like a hunting dog. Dontcha?” and kissed my forehead, “but I’ve said that before without you here, so there!” I just grinned and continued sorting the files. And, so, now he knows the story behind the mantra. I shared it with him as he worked and I filed.

I hadn’t previously told him the mantra you shared with me during your shamanic journey and that I repeat several times a day to keep me grounded. And then it came up over the weekend as we toured the new remodeling of our first home. “Hon, what do we need to do right now?” I said, “Love this house as it is?” He nodded. “One layer at a time. Let’s get settled with the newness we have and then talk about other remodeling later.”

I’m learning that loving what is now isn’t just about me, but many other things in my world. Love my work in the stage it’s in. Keep pressing forward, but relish where it’s at right now. Love where my marriage is now, regardless of whether we have children or not. Love my body, even if there’s only one leg and love me…

Love. Love. Love. Right this very minute. So every time I get frustrated and I find something to love about that very moment, even if it’s that it presents a problem for me to solve and learn from.”

Love What Is Now
Mary Anne

This is dedicated to Monica Foster who has been a light that shines so brightly for all of us to see. Thank you for allowing us to learn through and with you.

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February OM Meditations

Thursday, February 25th, 2010

I am celebrating the joy and love of another month! One way I am celebrating is to share my morning meditations and contemplative questions as a way to open up to more love.

As an invitation, feel free to close your eyes, sit with your spine straight and take a few soft breaths. Then inhale a little deeper through your nose, and on the exhale, repeat the mantra OM (AUM).  Do this three times. Allow yourself to really feel everything and become the observer of your thoughts. Feel free to focus on one question or statement below and just allow your experience to unfold.


Daily living is our enlightened state. How are you living?

I am the perfect companion I seek with another.

When you question the mind, the only truth left is love.

In the end, love shows up, and if you are open to receiving it, the experience of love is infinite. How do you experience immeasurable love and how does it show up in your life?

How do you define and experience ceremony?

The magic moment, the miracle, the unexpected is happening – are you willing to take the risk and listen to it?

Beloved, what do you hear in the silence?

There is nothing to undo.

I will wait for you – always. In your time, I am here.

Each person will have their own experience­—the invitation is to be open for whatever thoughts flow through you. Allow your mind and body to expand into the experience (without judgment).  Feel free to start with whatever mantra calls to use.

May you experience expansive love in every way. I would love to hear about your meditation experiences – drop me a line anytime!

OM Shanti, Shanti, Shanti,
Mary Anne

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