Posts Tagged ‘Paulette Rao’
“DO IT AFRAID”
Thursday, May 14th, 2009
Reverend Joyce Meyer tells a true story of “Do It Afraid.” The story is about Elizabeth Elliot, whose husband was killed, along with four other missionaries, in Ecuador. Elizabeth was devastated and said her life was controlled by fear. Every time she felt she was making progress and ready to minister again, her fear stopped her in her tracks. During a conversation about her devastating fear, a friend simply asked, “Why don’t you do it afraid?” Elizabeth listened and she did just that. Along with her friend Rachel, Elizabeth was able to return to Ecuador and minister again, including ministering to the very people who had killed their loved ones.
The first time I heard this line it was posed to me by my Life Coach, Paulette Rao. I was stuck in my own spiral of thoughts and hesitant to move forward. I had expressed how I wanted to make a bigger contribution in the world, but I was playing it safe. I told her I was scared of playing full out. Paulette’s response was, “Playing full out does mean being willing to look at the fear of breaking through instead of living with the feelings of playing small, safe. Playing safe is equivalent to not blowing air into that balloon you talked about for fear of pushing the edges out. Scary place—a place you’ve never been. It is a choice. Fear of failure or the pain of longing, regret, and resentment of not going for it. Playing safe –well, we know that pain.” Paulette then challenged me to, “Do it afraid.” She added, “Which is better – the pain of what you’re doing right now or the pain of breaking through?”
Every time I really show up in the world, I do it afraid. Every time I teach, facilitate a workshop, or lead a meditation, I do it afraid. I do it anyway. I imagine myself as I want to be in the world and I live from that place. I visualize how happy I am when speaking, listening, and holding space with others. I imagine asking myself how did I get through that really hard moment and what did I learn?
In her book, The Soul of Money, Lynn Twist interviews a woman held back by fear. She asked her what it was that got her through those first years of being able to create the opportunities for herself and her daughters. The woman responded, “I stopped letting fear stop me. I was afraid, but I did it anyway. I trusted myself.” This is the place I want to live from. I want to trust myself enough to always do it afraid.
Recently while teaching a weekend intensive, I retold Elizabeth Elliot’s story as a metaphor of how we can show up for ourselves. I reminded participants that we come to the circle alone, scared, worried, and often projecting our own insecurities, but we show up. I invited the participants, many of whom I have taught for three years, to do it afraid. Whatever the ‘it’ is, do it, live it, breathe it. You want to create a Peace Wall – do it. You want to paint in your studio and then create massive sculpture pieces – do it. You want to chant and sing, and drum – do it. Do it anyway. Do it despite yourself.
Playing small doesn’t serve anyone, but it feeds the fear voice. I notice when I am in fear, I edit myself and become silent. I find myself listening to the voice that says, “That’s the craziest idea I ever heard.” Or the one that says, “Who do you think you are?” When I share about my creative workshops/circles with other people, I might get ‘that look’ or stare or even a reply of a long OKAY. Right away my mind translates that to mean that I’m strange. Finally, I had the courage to ask someone what they meant by their “OK response” and they said they were not sure what I meant and were embarrassed to ask for more information. I could have given into the fear and thought I ought to be silent or I could play full out and ask for more.
My Life Coach Paulette was so on target about playing full out and recognized my emergence in the world. As she put it, “It is time for you to shine, to emerge, to play full out. It is time or it wouldn’t be keeping you up at night. It is time because every shred of evidence points at the value you create and I know you’re committed to continuing creating it.”
Eleanor Roosevelt taught this lesson as well many years ago when she said, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” I am ready to play full out and make a larger contribution in the world. I am committing to doing one thing afraid every day and I invite you to join me.
What is one thing you are willing to do today to play full out?
Whatever it is, do it afraid!
Special thanks to my coach & friend Paulette Rao who has been a special part of my journey to emerge. http://truenorthresources.com/home.html
Also, to learn more about Lynn Twist, check out her Soul of Money Institute. http://www.soulofmoney.org/about