Posts Tagged ‘Coaching’
Would You Rather Fit In or Stand Out?
Tuesday, May 8th, 2012
It’s easy and safe to fit in, to conform, to do what everyone else is doing. And yet for many of us, that is no longer working. It is time to step outside the crowd, to stand out, to shine and bring our gifts to the world. Staying small isn’t serving anyone.
I work with lots of people and organizations who are ready to play bigger in the world. Just recently I sent an email to a client and asked them to dream ‘boulder’ – of course the spelling should have read bolder. And yet, boulder seemed more fitting. In order to stand out, to really stand out, we may need to move the internal boulders holding us back.
What boulder are you ready to move out of your way? What would it take for you to stand out?
{Permission to share photo taken by my friend Clarance Dickinson}
“Who’s in Your Fab 5?”
Monday, July 20th, 2009
Mary Anne & her drumming Fab 5 in Hawaii
There is an amazing new book out called The Talent Code, by Daniel Coyle. Coyle visited some of the world’s greatest “hotbeds”, which are small areas that have produced large amounts of talent. It’s all about having a better understanding of where talent comes from, how we learn, and how we can discover more by our mistakes. Coyle talks a lot about how we can acquire skill by learning about a substance called myelin. “Myelin is the insulation that wraps around nerve fibers and increases signal strength, speed, and accuracy.”
According to Coyle, there is a pattern in acquiring talent that includes, “deep practice, ignition, and master coaching.” I found this fascinating. I always wondered what talents were inherited and which ones were not. How can we increase our level of talent? …Practice, practice, practice.
In looking at how to increase our level of talent, I found there were other factors such as confidence, motivation, and environment. Want to build up that myelin? Here are just a few of my suggestions.
There may be times you want to do something new or increase your level of performance, but fear gets in your way. Notice and acknowledge fear when it arises. The more you push it away, the more it returns – even bigger and louder.
- Make mistakes. We not only learn by doing; we also learn by re-doing. Our brains can actually recalibrate according to what we learn from our mistakes. So, go ahead and use that phrase you did as a kid, “Do-over.”
- “You are who you hang out with.” A good friend of mine, Fr. Bob, once said this to me on a retreat back in 1989. Basically, look around and see who you are hanging around with and that will show you where your energy and actions are drawn towards. Are your friends there to support you on your journey or holding you back? Another way of saying this is, “Who is your Fab 5?” Take an inventory of the people who most influence your life.
- Do something new. Push yourself. Challenge yourself to do one thing that scares you. “Do It Afraid.”
- Ask questions. Push the limits of your brain and your heart. Begin a practice of asking questions daily and see what emerges. Create a question ritual. I find by asking a BIG question, it leads me to what is next in my life. My big question this month is: How can I be of MORE service?
- Follow your breath. Your breath is your will. When you are ready to start a new project, practice your skills, or create a path, start with your breath. Use your breath to guide you. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth, slowly and deeply. Awareness of our breath allows for better focus.
- Finally, our coaches were right – practice, practice, practice. Repetition is key when wanting to acquire a new skill.
So, go ahead, make mistakes, practice, and find a good coach. Then look around and ask, “Who’s in your Fab 5?”
Thanks to my “Fab 5” for keeping me on track, pushing me to be more, and allowing the space to practice, to grow, and to develop.
Who’s in Your Cabinet?
Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009
OK, I’ll admit it. I have been intrigued with everything about our new president. I have been watching every little thing President Obama does – from the swearing in ceremony, to the dance with the first lady, to the first day of signing executive orders. I have been amazed at the shift in the thinking, the hope of what is possible, and the potential at what this country can do with one another.
I was intrigued by every new Cabinet position announced by President Obama. I thought about what kind of Cabinet I would want to create. I began to generate a list of new Cabinet positions I would like to see.
My list of new Cabinet members includes a Secretary of Humor, someone who makes us laugh and reminds us not to take ourselves so seriously. I would also appoint a Secretary of Play, someone who reminds us that play is important for our health and well-being. In this position, the member would help us remember all the games we played as children, give us time to sing, to dance, to drum, and to color outside the lines. Finally, I would appoint a Secretary of Coaching so when all the predictions of doom and gloom come our way, there is someone asking the important questions about possible solutions. They will ask us how can we solve some of the most important dilemmas and they will keep asking. The Coach will believe in us when we forget and remind us that together we can do anything.
There are a lot of economic, social, and environmental issues to work on over the next four years. May be adults can relearn to ask more questions, take more naps, and connect the dots. Perhaps it is time to we all give ourselves permission to color outside the lines.
Who is in your Cabinet? Have fun!
Mary Anne